RESPONSE: What makes an Artist anyways...

I don't think it really matters what everyone else says. If they believe they are an artist, that's all fine and dandy, but the rest of us know they aren't.
Being an Artist/Writer/Actor/etc. requires you to earn the title before you can go flaunt it around. Unless you are successful, unless you are making a solid living, unless you have been influential, unless you have made some sort of impact, etc. etc. you can't just call yourself something you're not.
A person going through Med School doesn't go around saying they are a doctor, they have to get the degree, get certified, get a job, and actually be doing it.
I'd be lying if I said I was a writer, because I'm not. Just like those people calling themselves an artist. They have to realistically look at themselves and say...hmm. Does drawing anime make me an artist?
Let's look at a definition here straight from the dictionary...
Artist
1. a person who produces works in any of the arts that are primarily subject to aesthetic criteria.
2. a person who practices one of the fine arts, esp. a painter or sculptor.
3. a person whose trade or profession requires a knowledge of design, drawing, painting, etc.: a commercial artist.
4. a person who works in one of the performing arts, as an actor, musician, or singer; a public performer: a mime artist; an artist of the dance.
5. a person whose work exhibits exceptional skill. (This is you Trung. XD And you're definitely dabbling in a few of the other numbers aren't you?)

In order to be called an 'artist' you HAVE to be actually striving for something much higher.
If you want to be an artist you have to be actively improving your skill, expanding your knowledge, developing a successful trade, and generally doing what is right by the established fine arts. So many people just call themselves an 'artist' and well, they're done. How do you grow off of that? If you think you are there, how can you feel like you've reached a higher point? I think it's sort of like lying to yourself, being lazy, or just not trying hard enough.

Isn't it terribly insulting to great people like Da Vinci, Michael Angelo, etc. that anyone who does something as doodle chibis label themselves an 'artist'? They put themselves in the same category as these people, and that's just not fair. They haven't put in the necessary work for it, it's just wrong.
Same for people who write. If I even THOUGHT of calling myself a writer, I'd slap myself silly. Nothing I do can even constitute being anything close to heralding such a title. I don't deserve it, and won't for a looong time. I have to reach it.

It's not even about being too critical on myself or fishing for compliments or whatever nonsense people will use to defend, it's simply being REALISTIC.

I'm just getting tired of people watering down something that has always been such a prestigious talent.

Sure, in a perfect world filled with sunshine and smiling rainbows and happy bunnies and in a high pitched giddy voice someone shouts from the heavens, "Everyone is a writer! Everyone is an artist! Anyone who can express themselves can be called this, EVERYONE."

It's just simply not true, even though people so readily believe this.

It's nice to think that everyone has something special in them isn't it?
It makes us feel good about ourselves, it makes us feel important, it makes us feel special.
We've literally grown up in a society where everyone is told they have potential and they can do whatever their little heart wishes...

But come on.

The real world has never worked this way, and unfortunately, by allowing everyone to think they are something that they are not, they are setting themselves up for failure.

Unfortunately, about half of the people on DeviantArt aren't going to get any farther than that, and yet they will still steal a term of endearment that does not rightfully belong to them.
They didn't spend the time studying.
They didn't spend the time improving.
They didn't spend the time taking the risks, putting themselves out there, and making a life out of it.

Nope, because "Expressing myself" is all I need to do. Because that's what everyone is going to tell me, because art is easy, writing is easy, and everyone is so god damn special that we all can be called whatever we want.

Well my 4 year old second cousin colored a picture of Peter Pan, didn't keep in the lines, smudged it, and ripped it up. Sure, this is a valid form of expression.
But would you buy it?
Does this impress you?
Will this influence other pieces?
Will this be studied, discussed, analyzed, and revered for a long time?
Are they an artist?


I'm sorry for my extremely narrow-minded view, and I hope I haven't offended, or caused you to disagree with me in anyway, but I like to take these things a bit seriously, and if people aren't going to work at something that needs to be earned, I get a bit testy.
This was definitely a rant, and I'm sure I have not stated my opinions intelligibly, and I feel like I still didn't get my point across perfectly.

Again, I apologize if you don't agree.
Now I'm kind of worried, because I got a bit heated here. =/

Anyways, for the record, I believe you have great potential to be an artist Trung. ;)

That's it.

I'm writing an essay.
It's going to be crazy long, complicated, and absolutely brilliant.
It's going to be called, "Why I loathe Twilight."

Seriously.

I saw so many people today, wearing crazy Twilight shirts that said horrible things like, "Ima love you foreverz because I'm a dependent submissive women, just like my over-protective, pedo of a stalker slave driver vegetarian vampire wants me to be. Also, I like kitchens".
Okay, well, that's not what the shirts said, but that's pretty much what they all translated too.

Also, "And the lamb fell in love with the lion" MAKES ME WANT TO TAKE A GUN TO MY FACE. I get so angry whenever I see/read this. My blood is boiling now that I'm thinking about it. How can someone get so hateful over a stupid line in a stupid book?

Well ladies and gentlemen, I loathe Twilight. That's why.

New person in cafe now, likes Twilight. I think she may be..."special?" Or intelligence may be questioned...

Isn't that horrible? When I judge someone's intellect based on wether or not they like a book?

Because to me, when someone says they like Twilight they are pretty much telling me:
-I don't pay attention to things around me
-I'm self-indulgent, and think of my needs over everyone elses
-The most important thing in life is pleasing my boyfriend, everything to do with my boyfriend comes before everything else in the world.
-I am disrespectful, shallow, and judgemental of other people (lolololol okay, hypocrite alert on that last one, since I'm being all judgemental on Twilight fans, but still)
-I blindly follow fads/ I cannot think for myself/ I don't question things/IF EVERYONE THINKS IT'S BRILLIANT, IT MUST BE, RIGHT? (This one I have a huuuuuuge problem with. I'm deeply concerned based on a political/historical/social spectrum of everything that could possibly go wrong in the world...happens because of these idiots)
-I deny the independence of women, and am some how okay with the idea of a submissive kitchen wife with no future/plans for education or a career who is intent with only making babies and pleasing her man. In a masocistic sort of way, I completely disregard thousands of years of women striving to prove that are capable of more than this.

There is more, and I could go on and on, but that's why I'm thinking of actually writing this all out clearly and, well, 'good'.

Basically, I make snap decisions about somebody based on their liking of Twilight, which is wrong I admit, but is it completely unfounded?

I know you could simply assume, that half the people who enjoy Twilight just read for the fun of it and aren't paying attention to things like that nor are they anaylizing every single bit of every book they read.

But to me, I find that a little frightening. So it's just a book, but it's about 'being aware.'

People aren't going to pay attention to thinks that really should be looked at a little more closely.
It's all about having fun, living your puny little life without a care in the world, cuz hey, what does it matter to me?

I'll remember to point out just how much it matters when the world is run by robots or something in the future. You know, something that could have been avoided if people 'paaaaayed attention.'

Hahaha. /end rant of tangents.

I promise this isn't want any essay would be like, which is the point of structuring it. But I'm seriously sick of it all. I think we should all be writing about it, maybe compile it all together and send it out the publishers.

Someone has to do it I tell you!

The Bitch in the Red Dress.

Moved to Writing for the Sake of Writing where it belongs. >.>

Sorryz.

SOMEBODY ALERT THE PRESS!

My...'tragedy' sense is tingling?


So one of my dogs died last night, the older one, Molly.

Thing is, I think I know around the time it happened.

It was late at night, around 2:30ish when I started to feel that right about now, it was going to happen. It was just kind of a weird feeling, and all of the memories of Molly began flooding through my mind, one by one. My brother told me to think about saying my goodbyes because she wasn't looking too good lately, but at this point and time during the night, I knew that it was already too late.


A few weeks ago, one of the regulars who comes into the cafe, Jolene, showed me pictures of their latest renovations on the house. In one of the pictures was an adorable little Pit Bull, and I gushed on how cute I thought she was. So she told me all about the little tyke, "Gypsie" and told me that she has a problem with her heart, like some Pit Bulls do (There are a lot of health problems with this breed). So they've wanted to make Gypsie's little life the best she could ever have, and Jolene, like most dog users, regards Gypsie as her baby, a member of the family.
So I thought it was really weird, when one day a week or so after she had told me about her dog, and not having ever thought of it again or Jolene really outside of work on my own free time...an overwhelming feeling that something was going to happen to her dog rested on my mind all day. Once it passed, I didn't think anything of it. Until of course, Jolene came into work a few days later, rather upset and told me that her and Chuck had just come back from a trip to Georgia to find out from her sister that her dog Gypsie had suffered a fatal heart attack while they were gone.
I was kind of in shock, a little, I mean. I wasn't sure why I was thinking about her dog at all, or feeling like something was going to happen...and than turns out something did, and her dog had died. I just found it incredibly strange at the time.

But than I've been thinking, it's kind of always how I've been.

Recently, when that big storm was going on last weekend and everyone was freaking out in our area, I remember sitting very calming in the basement. While I was listening to all of the updates on the news, I just sort of sat there and thought for a moment...considered my feelings, where I was at mentally, and knew I was going to be okay. I thought for my brother and mother, yeah, they'd be fine, and I went back upstairs during all the warnings and crazy weather because I knew I'd be safe.

Not to mention a day before that drunken car fiasco I had been on my toes. I wasn't sure how I was feeling, because I felt like something bad was going to happen, but I didn't feel at the same time that anything bad was going to happen to any of us. It was really confusing, but when it happened, I feel that I was sort of ready for it? I immediately sprung into action, regardless of my whole body shaking, I never once froze, and I worked as quickly as possible to get all the necessary aid. I was all prepared to talk her out of the shock too, and would have if the firefighter wasn't already taking care of her.

I don't know, I find this all rather interesting, and could probably think of many more incidents where I had some sort of feeling before it happened. Call it womanly intuition or mere coincidence, but I think that sometimes I'm more in tune with my surroundings than I think.

Besides I think everyone is capable of sensing some things like this...it's whether or not that person is paying attention to their thoughts and feelings to actually notice or care.

On the topic of secrets...

You know what I'd love to do right now?

Have a sleep over with you Trung.

Like, stay up all night doing the things we do, go off on tangents, until we get all tuckered out. Turn off the lights, try to fall asleep and swap secrets.

Just...the kind of stories or really personal things you don't really talk about to anyone you know? Until that moment, when you're lying there in the dark, contemplating about where you've been, what you want to do, things that scare you, things you're ashamed of, happy memories, etc. etc. Silence from the other person, as they listen to you, really listen. Everything is quiet, the world is sleeping, lights off, just the voice of a familiar soul.

That's when you really hear somebody. I feel like, there is so much going on during the day, so many distractions, so many worries, so many responsibilities, desires, so much noise. The world is so loud.

I need this.

Once, I was at a bonfire sophomore year and there was about 30 people there. There was laughing, yelling, people running around, branch fights, everything you could imagine. And me and the host decided to go for a walk.

She was one of those ditzy girls, always laughing all over the place, asking the meaning of things, falling over herself all the time. At least, that's what everyone saw right?

We both laid in the grass, away from all the ruckus and just looked up at the stars.

It felt quiet there, and so beautiful. And she was calm, and she was intelligent, thoughtful, everything you never thought was there. We had one of the best conversations I can remember, we shared so much about ourselves, it was surreal. She told me things she had never spoken to another person, and I did the same. It felt so relaxing for once. Taking off the mask.

Not that I'm wearing a mask around you, but I feel like there are a lot of things I don't share. I don't share it with anyone. Recently, I've felt a great deal of information wanting to break out of me, I don't know how to handle it.

I've been posting a lot of really strange blogs on here, and none of them make much sense. The language and desire to share is lost between all the ramblings and hurry to be rid of the thought. They feel silly and immature to me. It's just not right. It's not coming out the way I want.

Anyway, I'm sitting up right now. Not doing anything in particular, but feeling like I have something to do. You know where you're telling yourself, "Get off the computer, time for bed, there is nothing left to do, you don't need to be up this late for nothing, sleep please." But you just can't...something left unfinished. You spend hours trying to find what it is, but you never do until you can barely keep your eyes open.

I feel like this is it.

I was thinking. About all the things I want, need, to share.
And I was thinking, wouldn't it be lovely if I were having one of those late night conversations with Trung right now?

That would have been lovely.

Oh Trung, why did we have to be the opposite gender? I feel like this couldn't be allowed to happen, even though your glaringly obvious attraction to men. You still have the tool that could result in my pregnancy, therefore, I doubt either parental unit would be okay with it.

Bah. Who knows.

I guess maybe I could post a secret a night? Or we could exchange secrets or something? Or stories, or profound thoughts and the like. I mean, we pretty much do this now, but there is just something about not holding back in the dark while you struggle to stay awake in the world of reality before slipping away to dreamland.

They are waiting for me I suppose...

Hmmm. Sometimes I feel like the only time the real me ever surfaces is at this hour of night...
No one sees who I think I am. I am in my head. I go to sleep with the image of me every night.
But I believe there is a time...where I'm ready to close the book on the day, and the Sophia I think I am is stirring awake from her fantasy ride and we become one for the briefest of moments.

And that's when the best conversations happen.

Good night sweetheart, and pleasant dreams kiddo.

I'll wave goodbye in the morning.

My Secret Best Friends?

(This is long, and nonsense. I just felt like writing to myself about it I suppose. Nothing actually worth reading here, all fictional. XD)

I love sleeping.

Whenever I close my eyes, I know another adventure is about to begin. I know it's a lot better than the real world too, and I like to sleep as much as possible.

It's a familiar world. I've been there my entire life, and there are many things waiting for my nightly return. Unfinished tasks, new problems to solve, foes to vanquish, and a handful of friends whom I miss dearly.

Wait, friends? In my dream world?

It's funny, because I didn't realize how much I depend on these friends when I am awake and real until just now. Sometimes I wake up so refreshed, so happy, so imaginative, so...FULL. And I look back and realize it's because I had a lot of fun last night. Sometimes if things don't go well, I wake up feeling empty and miserable and the rest of the day never really picks up.

It's weird, because real-life people usually make up my dream world friends. There are a lot of people I know in real life who are my friends who appear in my dreams. But oddly for the most part, when they show up it is usually to torment me with drama/fights/make me cry, hurt my feelings, etc etc. So, it's only fair that the people who appear with these emotions are the people who have hurt me in the past. Suffice to say, they don't appear all that often, but I prefer it that way.

So who am I friends with in my dreams than?

Well, this is where it gets a bit embarrassing. My friends range from real-life people, to my made-up characters, to complete strangers that I've never met.

Real-life people usually consist of famous people, or someone you see a lot of and sort of create an ideal version of them right? I don't actually know them, but your brain sort of puts the pieces together based on what you've seen or heard about them.

I woke up this morning feeling great, I don't know why, but I was with BoA, and some gorgeous black girl I had never met before last night. We were very close friends though. Both me and the black girl (I don't even know her name!) were helping BoA learn English and taking her all around the Twin Cities and showing her the 'American' culture. It was a lot of fun, and random things happened and actual conversations took place. Also, I thought this was really funny, but at one point, Max Grover appeared, and kindly struck up a conversation and tried to flirt with BoA quite openly, which had me and the other girl rolling our eyes and whispering to each other. Once he sauntered back over to his friends, I immediately grabbed BoA by the arm and told her alll about his targeting of Asian women and how he wanted to get in friendly with her so he could help out his modeling career. Good to word, Max strides over again, and begins asking BoA out in the most egotistical way, to which she politely declines. We laugh it off, and the three of us girls decide we're going to teach BoA how to make a pizza. Fun girl times ensue.

So what? The Asian Brittany Spears is my best friend? She'd actually give me the time of day? Well in my dream world, yes.
Other ones include Nishikido Ryo of course, but we're just friends, the language barrier is interesting as well, because it comes out in the dream world and we don't speak much, but that's fine with the both of us. When we hang out, it's usually something quite adventurous. Most recently, I randomly decided I was going to get stranded in the world, and make my way around to every country and make a challenge/story out of it! So of course, the first stop is Osaka, where I can pick up Ryo because I want him to come with, because I know he'd secretly love too. He's hesitant at first, gets a little angry at me for being so crazy about it, than reluctantly agrees. Amazing Traveling Adventure ensures. Seriously, it was reaaaally great. I feel like writing about all the things we did, it was so fantastical, I'd like to expand on it and add some more scenes to it.
Another one who I was really good friends with was Brooke Davis/Sophia Bush. I'm not sure which one it actually was, but I'm assuming it was fictional Brooke Davis since I would know more about her than Sophia. Back when I'd be watching One Tree Hill all the time, Brooke in my dreams was a constant presence, she was my best friend, and we did everything together. I haven't seen her in awhile actually, mostly because I don't think or care for One Tree Hill anymore, but I do miss her, and wonder how she's doing? I think that's the craziest thought so far!

As for made up characters, Max and Demi and the most frequent. We know everything about each other, so there isn't that dynamic where you actually learn more about your friends or get to know them. Which is a bit sad really, and they don't show up often. I suppose they appear when I am in the need for something quick, comedic, and full of shenanigans. That's what those two are good for.

And than there are the people I don't know, at all. There are a lot of faces that appear repeatedly, but I don't know there names, or who they are, but apparently we have an established relationship and they are there for me. Weeeird. Once such strange person was, after the drunken teenagers ran their car into our tree, and I saw that blonde chick covered in blood, she haunted my dreams, but as my friend? I was worried about her, and wondered if she was okay, and we became friends in dream world. It was so weird, except I didn't get a warm feeling from that, more of a traumatic shaky feeling. I didn't want to see her, and once more of the story became clear and I learned how rude and how the whole scenario was her fault, she did not appear in my dream again. Thank god, but I just thought it was weird.

So, what the hell? I have a completely different world that I go to sleep for. Different friends, different everything. I think it's crazy, apparently I fantasize about friendships lol. Oh well, I'm just not sure what that means. Maybe I'm subconsciously looking for adventure, and real world friends can't give that to me. It's not their fault, neither of us have the time or money to do anything remotely adventurous, but you can do all that in your dreams. And I guess for now that is enough.

Oh, and you have shown up a bit Trung, but never to hurt my feelings. When you do appear, it's mostly to join in on all the fun. Like, it's me and you, and than whoever the crazy person is who takes us both on a wild adventure. I think that's kind of cool actually, like, subconsciously, you're sitting next to me on the roller coaster, we're in it together always kind of thing.

I dunno! Nonsense! I thought I'd share. ;) For myself mostly, like anyone would really read this. XD