Call to Adventure

Maybe I'm just feeling a bit antsy but...

One of my coworkers who is 21 just got engaged.
Rachel's cousin, who is 18, just got engaged.

Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.

Is it just me, or is it a bit too young? I mean, I personally respect the fact that everyone wants different things in life, but I can't help but feel that I'd run away FAST if I was purposed to at this age.
Rachel and my devil's advocate Sean said it would all depend for them, you know, if you've been dating for a year or so, why not?

Gosh, am I horrible if I say that regardless, I would not be willing to tie the knot at that age even so?
I mean, I start to feel like I'm being unappreciative of my right to even marry whom I choose seeing as there are plenty of people out there who can't but...I have to look at this selfishly and know that I cannot be trusted to be tied down at an age where I have not had a chance to accomplish and go for my dreams.

Am I afraid of commitment? Relationships? Someone else?
I feel like a wild horse, not willing to be tamed. I strongly believe that if I were ever to be in a relationship, my significant other would find it difficult to come up with reasons to break up with me. Thus fueling my fear that I would be stuck, on the first boyfriend.
So silly and irrational, but it's not like I want to go run around with multiple guys, I just feel like I won't know what I truely want after only a relationship or two and CANNOT BE TRUSTED.
By that I mean, after I'm in a commited relationship, I feel like I'd see something else and want that instead. Horrible me.

But that's just kinda who I am I think. I was just kind of sitting around yesterday, thinking about being stuck in Minnesota my whole life and that thought freaked me out. I've gotta get out of here eventually. I've gotta live many places. I've gotta travel the world. I have to be free, if if I get tied down before I can fly free, I know that I'd spend the rest of my life feeling like a caged bird and would grow to feel resentment towards my significant other. Unless of course he was willing to run around with me, that'd be great. But still...
What if my guy isn't in Minnesota? That would haunt me forever.
But maybe all of this is just a reflection of my own independence from relationships? I don't feel like I need them to be happy, obviously, or I would have had one by now. I think it's unfortunate that I can't seem to find any lasting good in them, since I find it hard to believe that my dream guy could possibly exist. Ah, I just can't imagine being tied down at my age is all. It sounds completely crazy to me!

I really do want to go all over the place though. I do feel like the peace corp would satisfy me in that aspect, along with the whole 'making a difference'. But I also want to chase my dreams, and I know I can't successfully do that in Minnesota. I know I won't be leaving any time soon, but I have to promise myself I won't sit here and rot. I don't want to regret a thing in life. When I get married, I want to be completely satisfied and confident that what I'm doing is truely good for me and him and that it would only add to the many beautiful things in my life rather then hinder.

Anyways, I'm really feeling like my Heroine's Journey is ready to kick off soon. Hence the Call to Adventure. ;)